Thursday, November 6, 2014


Liability.  We often bump up against this word.  Recently we smashed up against it.

We asked for some help watching over Ben.  We got a, “Hmmmmmm, we need to check with our lawyers first.”
At this point, I know exactly where this is going, and I have already moved on.  But I let this little charade play out, letting the little devil on my shoulder get a tiny bit of satisfaction and a good laugh letting them waste their time, energy and money.  After the lawyer “talk”, we are told, “We can’t help you because it’s too much of a liability.”

I have heard this before, and it makes little sense.  I am not a lawyer, but I did take Law in high school and my teacher spent the whole semester explaining the difference between criminal court and civil court.  The lawyers didn’t say it was against the law to help Ben.  The cops aren’t going to knock down doors, slap on handcuffs and cart anyone off to criminal court.  Liability means suing, and that means a trip to civil court.  What the lawyers are worried about is a trip to civil court and a money settlement.  Now to take this one step further, I ask, “Who exactly would be taking them to civil court?”  There is no T1 mom union out there suing people.  The only logical people who would and could sue them would be Jeff and me!
What they are really saying is, “We can’t help your son because we don’t think it’s worth the risk that YOU will sue us.”

Now that is a bit insulting and offensive, but I am neither.  Because I know sometimes there is a difference between what you say and what you really mean.  And what they really mean is, “We are scared.  We are too scared to help you.”  Now that I get!  Because I am scared too!  And to be honest, if you are too scared to help I would prefer you didn’t.
This is when the little angel on my other shoulder, whispers in my ear and reminds me, when you are knocked down and feel kicked in the gut, these are the moments when you learn who the brave people are.  Because eventually someone will stretch out a helping hand and you get to meet real life heroes.  We have met these people before, our old school nurse (I Believe in Angels), Ben’s friend’s parents (A Sincere Thank You), his hockey coaches (An Ode to SMS Hockey), and they are all a blessing.

So with my little devil chuckling, hoping a nice big lawyer bill lands on someone’s desk and my little angel reminding me real angels do live among us, I shut the door on any more stupid liability talk.
We are doing fine, matter of fact, Ben is doing great!  And we can handle this, with the help of those people that love us and all of those brave real life super heroes!


  1. You are a whole lot calmer than I am... I'm not sure what my reaction would be if someone said that to me about Elise, but there is a reason redheads have a reputation for temper issues!

    Btw, I had lunch with Alison the other day and we talked about you. All good things, of course!

  2. "Now that I get! Because I am scared too!" <---love.