When we left the doctor's office, after we first got the official T1 diagnosis, I went straight to my parents' house. At this point I have no idea what Ben is thinking. He does not seem nervous or scared. I, on the other hand, am horrified. I keep wishing I had read more on webMD the night before. I still don't understand what was happening. But I did decide that I must remain calm and not appear scared because I didn't want to worry Ben who appears to still be OK. When we reach my parents' I asked Ben to wait for me in the car. I enter the house and immediately fall to the floor. I sob for approximately ten seconds. Then I decide I can't do this. I stood up and announced to my dad, who had answered the door, that Ben had Type 1 diabetes. I explained we need to go to Children's hospital in Boston right away. Then I ask if he can take care of Garren and Cole for a few days. Like any great grandparents, they say yes. With that taken care of, Ben and I drive to Fenn to pickup Jeff.
At some point after we left the doctor's office I called Jeff. I can't remember this conversation exactly. I believe it was as simple as "Ben has Type 1 diabetes and we need to go to the hospital right now."
While I was waiting for Jeff in the school parking lot, the school nurse came by. She had already heard about Ben and was coming to check on us. She assured me that there had been many medical advances made in training and hopefully even curing Type 1 diabetes. She said that she truly believed that a cure would be discovered in Ben's lifetime and we wouldn't have this disease his whole life. What? I had not even considered or realized that this diagnosis was forever! But this piece of hope that she had shared with me I held on to, tightly. From this point on, every time anyone, doctors, nurses mention that Ben will have to attempt to manage this disease for the rest of his life, I dismiss that thought. I refuse to think in those terms. Our family, including Ben, have only talked about Ben having T1 until the doctor's find a cure. This bit of hope that the school nurse gave us was a huge gift. I believe in angels. And I believe that she is one.
I have learned many great lessons during this journey and this was my very first. A well timed kind word can change someone's life forever. Maybe this is actually the second lesson. The first would be if you are going to diagnose your child on webMD then you should read the whole page!
Thanks T.F. - you helped me deal with the initial shock too!
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